My Sickness


“You are my sickness.”

“If I’m your sickness, I am the cure.”


Fuck Reality



the weather this weekend was beautiful
the thunder rolled
and the lightning struck
the rain hid my tears
I didn’t give a fuck

the company this weekend was amazing
he held my hand
and he kissed my lips
but it wasn’t his hands
I felt on my hips

the dream this weekend was comforting
you were here with me
and you touched my face
when I opened my eyes
I still felt your embrace

the reality this weekend was ..
it was as it always is
it was reality
fuck reality

I need to be touched


You are miles away
And yet you touched me
In a way no one else has

You touched me intellectually
And made me think of things
I would have never thought of

You touched me emotionally
And made me feel things
I had never felt before

And when you were not here
To touch me physically
You made me touch myself
And imagine you were here

I miss you.
Yes.  I miss you Jack.
I need to be touched.
In so many ways.

A Flower for Jack

If I could talk to you
I would tell you how much I love you
and miss you everyday

But since I can’t talk to you
I tell myself
what a selfish bastard you are

If I could hear you
I would listen to you tell me
everything I want to hear

But since I can’t hear you
I listen to myself cry in agony
over the pain you have caused

If I could see you
I would look into your eyes
and allow you to feel what I feel

But since I can’t see you
I look into the mirror
and see an image of disgust

If I could touch you
I would outline your lips with my finger
before I kiss you softly with desire

But since I can’t touch you
I have slit my wrists
and slowly die in a puddle of blood

Happy Valentine’s Day Jack … XXXOOO