I had no idea what finally hearing his voice would do to me. I don’t have the best of memories, but I remember that day so very well. I was nervous at first, holding my phone in my sweaty palm. I had waited so long for this. He called me this time. I was sure not to drop my phone and allow it to shatter like he had done the week before.
After the initial “Hello” it was so comfortable. His voice and his accent excited me even more than his emails. To hear him say “Oh Jackie … Jackie … Jackie… Jackie” melted me. We had already been referring to each other as “Babe” and “Sweetheart” for quite some time, but hearing it was so much better than reading it. Part of me feels incredibly stupid. How can you be so in love with someone you’ve not met? How can you ache to touch someone you’ve not seen? How could I have allowed this to happen?
By this time I was over the questions. The how’s, the why’s and the what if’s. I wanted him like I have never wanted anyone in my life. He was so different. So smart. So loving. So caring. So giving. So mine.
He was mine. And I was his. We didn’t know where this was headed. But we both agreed that there was no turning back.